Orphan 55 By Ed Hime

Amy Booth-Steele as Hyph3n, Who Does Not Deserve Any Further Discussion.

Orphan 55 by Ed Hime

What it’s about: A Mysterious Token to a Spa leads the Doctor into a post apocalyptic wasteland that the internet really, really hates. 

Oh, Brilliant: Adequate Jodie again, as this series 11 leftover is definitely one of the more subpar releases of the entire revival. Jodie is not a problem. Never say Jodie is a problem, she is without a doubt, one of the few saving graces of the entire thing. I love the way she snaps at Yaz at the start for showing concern towards her.  I failed to mention something very important about Spyfall. She condemned the Master to a bunch of Nazis. Um, what? That is without a doubt one of the darkest things the Doctor has even done. Jodie is never gonna be the same as she was in series 11 now, she has a new layer of dark below the surface, much like how 7 was after his first two seasons.
And I absolutely adore this. Wait, no, I don’t enjoy the Nazi bit, but Series 12 is focused on the retooling of an unpopular Doctor to make her more palatable to the audience...and it’s working. Slowly, slowly, in both Spyfall and Orphan 55, we see that gorgeous anger underneath the surface for 13. And, although, yes, Orphan 55 is utter trash, you have to give it to it that it knows how to write 13. Until the climax where she turns into Captain Planet and monologues to the audience.

Yaz: ...I swear to god. Give this woman some dialogue, it’s as if the series learned nothing from the first.

Graham: He doesn’t do much.

Ryan: I cannot emphasize how bad Ryan is in this episode. People will tell you the worst thing about this episode is the Climate Change parallel which is indeed, hammered home in a way Star Trek would even shy away from, but the worst bit is the romantic subplot. Jesus Christ, tear my ears out and cook them in a flambé. This episode is...something. Ryan is constantly his annoying self, where he monotones all of his lines, and somehow makes them more whiny than Adric would have, and he is just- terrible. I hate the scene where the only thing he has in common with the girl is their parents are dead. I swear to god, he basically is like “so, our parents are both dead, want to bang?”
👏Kill👏Off 👏 Ryan👏

Benni: BENNI BENNI BENNI BENNI BENNI BENNI BEENNNNIIIIII

The Monsters: Dreg is a cool name for a monster. It looks cool. It’s functional. Whatever, I hate this episode.

Overall: I never thought I’d see Who so polarized. The internet has ravaged Orphan 55 so badly, I’m not even sure why I bothered. Yes, this episode is bad. No, this doesn’t mean that Everyone alive should shit on it. I could name eight worse Tennant and Eccleston episodes that everyone will skewer you for daring to insult, but of course, Jodie is a woman, so the entire internet goes fucking insane. Oh, I’m sorry, I went there. Because I don’t see another reason why Orphan 55 is so reviled. It is bad. It is not as bad as a story like Nightmare In Silver, Love And Monsters, or Twin Dilemma.
It is nowhere as bad as Exile, but those episodes do not have ninety minute video circlejerks on it, and entire forum boards screaming about firing Jodie Whittaker, but this one does, so...
Yes, I am not denying this episode is bad. But Jesus, stop with the CANCEL DOCTOR WHO YouTube videos with the JODIE WHITTAKER IS TERRIBLE AND HER ORGANS SHOULD BE THROWN IN A GRINDER thumbnails. I mean, this one is fine, Tsuranga Conundrum in Jodies era alone is worse, and although that one is hated, it has nowhere near as much bile as Orphan 55. Orphan 55 doesn’t deserve your torture. Give it a 2 on a review website, and move on. That’s certainly what I’m doing. 2/10