Doctor Who: Peladon

 

Doctor Who: Peladon

Peladon is so weird. It's one of those random Big Finish releases you get once in a while that appears completely fucking baffling to the average modern consumer who looks at it for five seconds on twitter and then never buys it. Advertising a set featuring the return of King Peladon was never going to be a quick and easy sell, and River Song, the modern version of the Eighth Doctor, and a certain cameo character's inclusion make it a little strange to try and sell to the Classic Who crowd, because the entire set is exceedingly modern in it's sensibility. I mean, a planet that appeared twice in all of Classic Who, in two random Pertwee stories, only one of which is really held in very much esteem.

Peladon, at least initially, appears as if it is dumb fanservice bullshit. The sort of thing that Titan Comics often goes under attack for, like when they had the Eighth and Eleventh Doctors meet up with Rose Tyler, or that time Harry Sullivan, The Ninth Doctor and The Brigadier met Martha Jones, who was at the time, a Gargoyle. It seems like it's stupid. It seems like it's UNIT shoving Bambera, The Axons, The Eleven and The Quarks in a boxset for no reason. In actuality, Peladon genuinely as a release serves a point as an anthology series documenting the history of an alien world and doing political commentary on the history of an alien world that is more similar to ours than you might think.

The anthology and the history parts are the cleverest thing about the set - when you look at that cover, that's what makes you think it's silly and fanservicey, it gives the impression that Alpha Centauri and River Song are having tea with the Sixth and Eighth Doctors, but each story is very seperate. However, as the best anthology series do, they inform each other thematically. Those of you who don't really care that much for the original Peladon stories will be impressed by how interesting they make this stupid little allegory. From a distant viewpoint, we see multiple points across all of Peladon's history, and how small events inform eachother in a way that's never been done in Doctor Who. While I always like that Doctor Who can go anywhere, exploring an individual planet's society like this over large gaps of time can lead to some utterly fascinating drama. 

I have a lot of good things to say about Peladon, because it's certainly miles cleverer than it appears, but let's not give it too much credit before we set off. The set can have some issues to it that certainly need addressing, and I wouldn't call it the best of Big Finish's work to ever be done. But it is one of those releases from time to time - like say, Masterful or Lady Christina - that's odd exterior is hiding some quality content you may not initially expect.

The Ordeal of Peladon by Jonathan Barnes and Robert Valentine

Without the draw of a main Doctor or Companion as the other stories have, cameos not withstanding, The Ordeal of Peladon arguably has the hardest job of the set in convincing you that the thirty fucking bucks you paid for this thing aren't totally gone down the toilet. The Ordeal of Peladon really surprised me though, as it could be a decent enough starting point for a spinoff without the need of Doctor Who, and I sort of hate that I'm saying that, because this is the only time in the set that it could really work, but nonetheless. This story is weirdly good.

It takes a page out of other good Big Finish spin-offs such as Gallifrey, and may even be seen as almost derivative of that particular spinoff. David Troughton returns in his television role as King Peladon - surprisingly for this story only out of the set, and he's probably the best thing Ordeal has going for it. It's also a halfway okay Ice Warrior story. To be fair, the Ice Warriors could be replaced by any other political ally of Peladon and have the story make sense, but the Ice Warriors can ALWAYS be replaced by something, so it doesn't matter really. This is by lack of competition, the best Big Finish Ice Warrior story. Wild, I know. 

Anyway, the Ordeal of Peladon, while a bit slow going, isn't actually an Ordeal to grind through. It's an unassuming story that knows what it is. It has fairly in-depth side characters, and I particularly liked David Sturzlaker as Rarlan, a seedy little political advisor guy. This is probably an in-one ear and out the other hour, but it's also a fairly well written one. It's one of those stories that I think most people are likely to enjoy. The best political stories are always ones where you don't have to care much about the politics - it is a sci-fi setting after all - and can instead enjoy the drama that arises from the scenario. The Ordeal of Peladon is smart enough to know this, and David Troughton and the ensemble cast deliver a solid opening to the set. 7/10 

The Poison of Peladon by Lizzie Hopley

In some aspects superior to it's predecessor, and in others, inferior, The Poison of Peladon is the slowest moving tale in the set, and while it's engaging enough, it is actively sedate compared to the other well-paced tales in the set. The story revolves around Professor River Song, who Big Finish have treated exceedingly well over the few years Alex Kingston has been involved in the company. She's gone from a little unsure of the audio medium to one of the company's most stalwart performers, and possesses a casual importance that makes her feel exceedingly high profile. River has long been equal in stature to the majority of the Doctors, so it is absolutely lovely to see her here, just randomly showing up on Peladon, because she's just as important as her husband. 

Lizzie Hopley is not my preferred writer for River Song - she penned (and I have no other way to say this, so please don't take this as unkind) three utterly atrocious stories Beauty on the Inside, The First Son and Precious Annihilation, all featuring River Song. Bafflingly, her characterization of River is on point in the Poison of Peladon - she writes River as a classy yet conspiratorial woman who always has a trick up her sleeve. I'd not have imagined that River would work so well as a diplomatic envoy. She really ruffles feathers throughout the whole story, and the story has very fun things to say about feminism and surprisingly, LGBT representation in Peladon's medieval society. It was not on my bingo card for 2022 that River be confirmed Non-Binary in the Peladon set of all things, but go figure!

River is disguised for literally the entire story as Sister Cantica, an alias that seems to be popping up more and more in Big Finish's stories. This makes the audio probably quite confusing for someone who is not aware that Sister Cantica is River Song - as established in both Doom Coalition 3 and Diary of River Song 7. While this is cute continuity, it may have been better to scrap it, especially since River being a woman of the cloth isn't very relevant to this story like it was to those other releases. River isn't even pictured in her usual Nun outfit on the cover. But it's still worth it to get to experience River and Alpha Centauri interacting, which is oddly one of the most lovely and joyful team-ups of random Doctor Who characters out there. 

This story is very slow. Exceedingly slow, and it's plot is paper-thin. This is both a flaw and a feature. Yes, you get to feel fun atmosphere and enjoy jokes and stuff, but it's also a mystery with only a few possible suspects, and the story keeps saying that the solution has to be this one, and the twist is that it's the other one. If your story is going to be an hour long, use your runtime correctly to spice up your central mystery a bit - or at least have the action come in sooner. The Poison of Peladon is the best Lizzie Hopley River script so far, yes, but this is also an exceedingly low bar. The pacing is fricked up to heck. The story oddly however relishes in the Peladon society in ways that previous stories were unable to do. Not only do we have Alpha Centauri and a diplomat from Arcturus, but the return of Thalira. Unless you're a diehard Peladon fan you probably only remeber Alpha Centauri, but Thalira and another Arcturan are very fun to have around. This is a very very slow but still enjoyable way to spend an hour. Usually more happens if you're going to do a Political Murder Mystery story - the plot really doesn't properly get started until around twenty minutes in. The weakest of the set, probably, but still good. 6/10 

The Death of Peladon by Mark Wright

One half of the duo who wrote Project: Twilight, Mark Wright is no stranger to writing for the Sixth Doctor, and this is one of the delightful "Bonnie Langford and Colin Baker had spare time, let's do loads of Six/Mel stories" we got this year. Being quite biased in favor of the Sixth Doctor, and also quite biased in favor of Melanie Bush, I was looking forward to this story more than the others in the set. It's also the one that is least important. The plot of Death of Peladon, while quick moving, is unassuming and basic. The good pacing is at least in contrast to the slow Poison of Peladon, though I think Death of Peladon also comes off as more generic in contrast. You may be getting a little irritated with the set's format at this point - this is the third story in a row where diplomats arrive on Peladon and things happen. This is thankfully, something eluded by the final story of the set.

The Death of Peladon sort of lives off of the dynamic of Six and Mel being so lovely, but it's also the least inspired of the stories. It's environmental themes are good, but said themes are done better by the next story. Almost everything in The Death of Peladon is actually, done better by the next story, minus Alpha Centauri, who was done better by the previous story. 

I didn't dislike the Death of Peladon at all when I did it, it was really kind of a fun time, but the more distance I have from it, the more I realize it is the least ambitious tale in the set. It's the most in-line with Classic Who runarounds, it's the most traditional, at least on paper. It's not traditional in execution, like say the Third or Fourth Doctor Adventures often could be. I have to once again say that I didn't dislike The Death of Peladon at all, but with distance, I am also wondering why exactly, because there's not much here. A story starring Erimem would probably have been better, but also Nick Briggs would shoot someone before that got commissioned. The villain of the story was good, I guess: 5/10

The Truth of Peladon by Tim Foley

Three stories into the set, we were getting into the "too much Peladon syndrome." Luckily, the cure for too much Peladon syndrome, is exceedingly good writing. Yep, it's a Tim Foley script, and it's a corker, really one of his best. It's got a much deeper allegory and things to say about society than any of the other stories in the sets, and it's also absolutely gorgeous. Look, I have nothing but good things to say about this one, you may as well go do it now.

The Truth of Peladon stars Arla, a Peladon Seamstress who hires the Eighth Doctor to help make a royal cloak, and is a story about this high class woman being exposed to the underbelly of the society that she helps perpetuate. It's a bitter and vicious story about how people ruin worlds for money, that the rich exist in their own little bubble, a façade where they pretend that the poor people around them are not suffering because they're just the hired help. There's a scene where Arla remarks that some people are poor and some people are rich, and that's just the way it is. As searing and anti-capitalist as TV's Oxygen, I was surprised by how far The Truth of Peladon went, and how good it was too. Like the best audio dramas usually are, it's mostly words, and they're very evocative ones. Lines from this story still stick with me, like Arla's speech about the apprentice she loved like a son but turned into the authorities and he was tortured to death. It's stunning drama that makes you pause and go: "wait, this is about that weird Third Doctor planet?"

It's the odd one out of the set, taking no established Peladon characters whatsoever, and the whole story only has four actors in the whole thing. It exists free of any established Peladon lore from previous stories. And yet it's also goddamn beautiful and the truest to the spirit of the original Peladon than any other tale in the set - like the Curse and Monster of Peladon were analogies for Britain then, the Truth of Peladon is an allegory for the world now. Brutally honest and astonishingly good, it kind of hurts me that a gem of a story like this is locked up in a boxset all but the diehard of fans will probably never hear - it may not be subtle, but this is a perfect story well worth listening to, a real diamond in the rough that I hope gets appreciated in the time to come: 10/10