Dark Eyes Three

 

Dark Eyes Three

Dark Eyes One was it's own story, and Dark Eyes Two was a way of picking up from that story in mostly one part things. Dark Eyes Three is completely different from the first two sets - it's kind of it's own story like set one and yet as a story it is an entirely incomprehensible one - Dark Eyes 1 goes from a moody introduction to a runaround to exploring a mystery to the end of that mystery, while Dark Eyes 3 goes from a one hour prologue starring The Master to whatever the Reviled is - Scorpion Negotiations about a War we don't see? to the Master and Doctor talking in a room for a while to an idea that is a whole boxset in of itself. I try not to be mean to Matt Fitton - hell, both his pieces for Dark Eyes Two were excellent, but the man is just overworked. There's very little you can find to enjoy in Dark Eyes Three... It's an overarcing story without the consistency of the episodes moving from story to story, and for gods sake, they really needed to have picked one or another, because you can do The Doctor and companion bouncing about in the TARDIS and encountering plot after plot but it's much more wicked to show up in a random location each episode to find Liv and Sally Armstrong have already found themselves in a new job (EVERY FUCKING STORY) and honestly I will be going through the episodes individually now but in all honesty, what I can say to one, I can say to all. And it's not going to be kind. I really loved Dark Eyes 1 and 2, but this is going to be a review filled with bile, let me tell you...

The Death of Hope by Matt Fitton 

The Death of Hope is a War Master story without the ability to commit. The Master showing up in a town to save people that he ultimately intends to use further for his nefarious ends is a decent pitch, but part of the problem is the title and setup. You're setting up a bleak story where everybody dies. Okay, sure.

Then fucking go through with your own idea. The death of the character Hope is in the title, and when your story ends with Hope alive? Then you've kind of already messed things up? This is an easy fix, and it wouldn't even really mess with the fabric of the boxset either. The storyline never calls for a return to Heron's world, and it's already canon the Master is doing this to a bunch of planets (see the Reviled) so why even save the planet at all? It's just a wreck. An absolute wreck. On the top side, Alex Macqueen and Natalie Burt as the Master and Sally are far more entertaining protagonists than The Doctor or Liv at this point, and Molly has been stuffed in the fridge for most of this boxset, but she's here, and she's good too. The Eminence are stunningly good. All of your elements here are good. Everything up to a point, is still good! All good! But an Ending can ruin a story, and The Death of Hope suffers heavily from trying to be bleak and not committing to it's own ideas. In story structure, you're supposed to commit to your ideas. BELIEVE they are strong, and throw everything you have at them. That's writing. You don't really second guess yourself in the last minute? I don't know if all the Torchwood and War Master releases have made me a bleak frickhead, but honestly, I was hoping for a certain direction, and it really didn't happen. Rather odd. 5/10 

The Reviled by Matt Fitton

The Reviled is something that if I was in charge, I might scrap entirely. Go straight to Masterplan. Or maybe even Rule, because god knows that one needs to have more time to simmer. But as it is, The Reviled is a standard Doctor Who story with negotiations between some bug people and some colonists, and they get mad at eachother, and they start to fight gradually, and the Doctor tries to fix it. It's very Colony in Space, just from a different direction. And at some point, (of course) the Arc kicks in because we have no interesting ideas here. The Reviled isn't needed, just further establishing of the Master doing his thing. And honestly, I'm going to compare this to a story that isn't always looked at favorably, but in The Sound of Drums, it made the very smart choice of ditching the mindless set up - especially since the set has 3 stories of building up with this set up, when you only really needed Death of Hope. A smart writer would spend this time letting us get to know Liv and the Doctor more (this is one of many times so far in the Dark Eyes series that Liv has just shown up at a job close to the plot and it starts to get absolutely incredulous, I know the Time Lords put her there this time but really, Liv showing up in a new job starts to become a running gag that isn't funny) But this story doesn't really let us get to know Liv either - she's a damn far cry from how good she'll be in Doom Coalition, Ravenous and Stranded, and it hurts me to look at this character that I absolutely love and have to be honest in saying that she's completely trash here. The Reviled is weak from almost every direction. 

Once again, I hang on the Master and Sally's every appearance in the hope we'll get some actual content - and McGann is far too bored to even merit my examination. The Reviled is both complete filler and somehow important to the arc (The Time Lords are mean? Maybe, I mean, the stories never follow up on this and Narvin is suddenly goody two shoes in the last episode) and that is a vile combination. God, I hate being this mean. 3/10

Masterplan by Matt Fitton

Masterplan is the episode here that actually has the most promise, but once again, the structure of the set is really really fricked up beyond belief, so I won't be amazingly kind to it either. It's mostly a two-hander between The Doctor and The Master (yay) and oh boy are these scenes electric. But also, it spends time on Liv fighting Sally in another new job (boo) messing around with the origins of the Eminence, with David Sibley playing yet ANOTHER Eminence related role in a completely unrecognizable way. (This cast is too good for this material.) Masterplan starts to be very good, but the scenes that are good are irrelevant to the arc, and when the arc comes back in, you really start to get tired of the cuts to Liv, who at this point, is not a companion, and is an assistant. She just gets a new job and mildly helps the Doctor each episode. This does not a companion make. And the story sadly has Sally Armstrong die, and although it's very effective, I really liked Sally and thought she had much more potential in her as a character, especially when it comes to how dignified a performance she manages even in this writing. But all the same, credit when it's due; actual promise is in this episode, as McGann and Macqueen are incredible now they actually get to bounce off eachother in a confined environment, working towards a singular goal that isn't technobabble (much) (okay I lied, it's a Dark Eyes story, there's a constant spew of tech bullshit) But at the very least half the story is good. and that's something that I'm willing to put up a few points for. Not that it will help the set's rating when we get to the next one: 8/10 

Rule of the Eminence by Matt Fitton

You know how earlier I favorably mentioned the Sound of Drums in reference to this set? You know, Sound of Drums/Last of the Time Lords, a story that is actually pretty good despite the heavily rushed ending, and the main criticism of said story is that it is rushed. Well. Let's do both the fucking episodes in one hour then, I'm SURE that won't be rushed at all jesus christ how do you go out of your way to be more rushed than that story this is at the very least a boxset in itself! For the most part, Rule of the Eminence is at least listenable (and even has some great moments) but you can't change the fact that the Master takes over the world in the first half and then has to be done away in half an hour. Half an hour to stop the Master controlling literally everyone on earth? You gotta be kidding me. 

The solution (and the problem) is Retrogenitor Particles, because it always is, there are no other words

None 

these aren't words that I'm typing, the only two words that exist in anything are clearly "Retrogenitor" and "Particles" because oh fucking boy are you ready to hear them EVEN MORE THAN USUAL HOLY COW-

I know Dark Eyes had a fair bit of behind the scenes trouble due to Ruth Bradley spontaneously deciding to not halfway through production of this set or something so I'm willing to give them credit that they did not have much to work with when it comes to Molly. I'm willing to almost forgive the next to total absence. But this is a wreck with or without Molly O'Sullivan, as much as I love her. Rule of the Eminence is one of the biggest wrecks made by this company that I've ever heard. It needed to be a full boxset. Not an hour. Three Parts minimum. Although I am a reviewer though, so I do have to mention that it does have some very good Newscast segments that put me in mind of Live 34 and made me want to listen to that instead. The happy newscaster saying "Glory to the Master, all shall die" etc made me actually like the story for a few seconds, because that's the thing, I really do want to like this set, especially since despite the Behind the Scenes problems, all the ingredients for success are still here. Matt Fitton can hardly do two stories in a set, and oh boy doing four was a bit too much for him, wasn't it? In the Writer's Notes for the Death of Hope, he writes, "At Last! A Whole Boxset To Myself! I might just go mad with the power..." and sadly it is my duty to inform you that he did. Dark Eyes Three is a dumpster fire of epic proportions, and as much as I really liked this series up to this point, I can't deny that I am incredibly disappointed. Upset. And I don't want to seem hostile to Fitton (Or his script editor Jonathan Morris) - they were up against a lot. But on the whole, I can hardly state the beats of Reviled or Rule of The Eminence. And I'm supposed to be reviewing it. Dark Eyes Three is like a UNIT Set but with added technobabble and timey wimey bullshit, and so not only do I have quite a bit of trouble understanding it, I have quite a hard time getting up the motivation to too (Molly's left and we still don't know why her eyes are dark and attack eminence now instead of Daleks, but forget that important plot point I guess) 

Look, I'll do Dark Eyes Four, but it's going to have to do quite a lot to impress me. And I'm sorry if this whole review comes off as mean - nothing but respect to these guys. But, Oh my lord. 1/10